Tuesday, August 9, 2011

Mumaith Khan in Punnami Nagu - See, but Don't Watch!

Interrupting my blog vacation for Dustdevil's Nag Panchami Festival, a celebration of snake movies across Indian film industries.

Until very recently I had only seen one snake movie and a very atypical one at that: Deepa Mehta's Heaven on Earth. Since I have no love for either Deepa or that particular film, it did not make it on my list to review. Which left me with... Mumaith Khan's Punnami Nagu! Just as well. It had been sitting on my shelf for far too long.

Sadly, as life sometimes conspires to prove you right, it turned out I really should have listened to my instinct and left it on that shelf. I always said I stay away from reviewing bad movies on this blog because I like to stay positive and show the things that make me love Indian movies rather than the garbage. And this is not even so bad it's good, it's just plain old BAD. Just to give you an idea we have:

- a father who puts a surveillance camera on his 18 year old daughter's belt and lets her go into the lion's den to... presumably spy, but really to dance.

- a side plot (probably sold as a comedy plot but as usual I failed to see the comedy) about this guy trying to basically sell his niece to some rich guy

- these three jokes of nature who pretty much spend all their time screaming, overacting and clowning around, again, with no actual comedy resulting from it.

- this evil witch who wants to rule the world... or something... after she comes to possess the two snake stones from the divine couple sent to save the earth (of course I'm not kidding! Would I do that to you?)

- this funky looking witch dude, I forget what he's there to do, some additional villainry, for sure!

- this other sideplot about the bad guys breaking into a college and blackmailing the principal with some footage of her in less than decent clothing. But get this, they make her arrange for dates with the girls in the college, so they can take their tops off and see if they had a snake tattoo. Don't even get me started with just how many things are wrong with this entire plot device, though I was actually grateful none of it led to rape. It's the little things in life, you know...

-  and yes, the gods in heaven trying to prevent the destruction of the human race!

So let me make this clear, this is not a review. Nor is it an invitation to watch this garbage. This is, in fact, a note to tell you to stay away from this terrible movie with no beginning and no end (actually, it has a beginning and an end, but not much in between), and instead to rejoice in the best parts of it which I tried to capture in this post: Mumaith Khan at her sexiest best! She is, let me assure you once again, the only reason why this post even exists: there can never be too many screencaps of this gorgeous woman. What can I say? I love her!

Short hair, isn't she cute as a button?
Awesome abs!
Giving Megan Fox a run for her money
Yellow helmets never looked happier
I just kinda liked this set-up
Short hair again FTW
Glam! And glitter!
And she moves like a snake alright!
Yeah, the subtitle says it all!
Plus, she totally kicks ass!
And she turns into a snake to avenge her soulmate
Hilarious photoshop job!
But it does look pretty damn cool...
So puuurdy!
In full seduction mode
Playing with the prey
If looks could kill...
Snake woman
And the snake dance that defeats evil. No really, I swear, it's the sheer power of her dancing.

So... yeah... this just about wraps it up for my entry for Nag Panchami. Enjoy the picspam, watch the songs if you can (I have yet to find a better dancer than Mumaith, Shriya Saran is the only one that comes close), enjoy some short and very random Chiranjeevi footage, and please, stay away from this DVD!


Beth Loves Bollywood said...

Okay sorry, delete that last one :)

Your assessment of the "snake tattoo detection" plot reminds me that over the last year or so I have encountered several films with similarly "THIS IS SO EFFING STUPID AND HARMFUL" plotlines that made me think "Well...at least she wasn't raped...yay?" Sometimes that's all you can say. Sad. SAD.

Anyway, on a happier note, I love the shorter hair too, I love the gold-doused heaven, and I love the photoshopped scales! The snake film I saw starring Ramya Krishna also gave her that treatment, all over her arms and face, though I think hers were even more poorly executed (but still 100% awesome, don't get me wrong!).

dustdevil liz said...

I think now that three people (you, me and DilBert) have watched this film, it's just as well that others are warned away. I completely get your relief that the plot was rape-free. You almost wish that Mumaith's sassy hair and awesome dancing made it worthwhile, but not quite.

I'm trying to remember if there were any actual snakes in this?

Unknown said...

hi Dolche,
a comment not relevant to the post above... but i didnt know how else to post it on your blog. i am pasting the clip below in case you havent seen it yet as it involves one of your favourites piggy chopps. enjoy.


Anonymous said...

No Liz I've watched it. And it is even worse than Dolce is letting on. I felt that the blink and you'll miss it Chiru song mash up was the Universe's way of compensating me for the time I've lost. It's a TERRIBLE film and the one that makes me wish Mumaith would stop talking ( I can't call it acting) and just dance. Temple

Dolce and Namak said...

Hey Beth, indeed, we must be thankful for the little joys of life. I still keep hoping that we will make it to a happy point in time and decency where such plotlines will be considered outrageous and disgusting... At least in old films you can take comfort in the fact that "it's an old film", no? Oh well... Hope springs eternal.

Hey Liz, you know even the picspam is owed entirely to you, I wouldn't have put this movie on my blog otherwise, blog snob that I am. :) But, I must admit, it WAS fun screencapping for it :) And yes, people need to be warned, so it's a small price to pay for rescuing other potential victims from this garbage.
So snakes? By "actual snakes" do you mean real snakes or just snakes shown. Yes, there are snakes shown, in quite a few places, but their close proximity to people and their uncharacteristic movements lead me to believe they are CGI snakes... I could be wrong though...

Dolce and Namak said...

Hari, yes, I had seen that, I was quite excited about it, really looking forward to it! And so sweet of you to post it here for me, THANK YOU!! :)

Oh Temple, you are, for once, even more exigent than me :) But it is, indeed, a bad movie, and you have my deepest simpathy for struggling through it. :) Unfortunately for us, not even Chiru can save *every* movie. :)

dustdevil liz said...

I decided to come back and make a note that I'm actually going to rewatch this, since my new SI supporting actor favorite is in it! Fortunately I can ff to his scenes.

Dolce and Namak said...

Ayyo!!! Your new crush is about as bad as my new crush! Fine, but you're on your own, don't come back crying about how awful it was ;)

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